What I'd Tell Myself

Dating. The teenage years. The drama. I'm sure I'm not the only one who wishes for a time machine at times, am I? I'd like to go back and tell my 16 year old self some things. Mainly about boys. About dating. And a few other things.

Seeing the teens I know and the drama that unfolds in their lives, I wish I could have understood then what I know now. I spent too much effort and thought focused on boys. And for what gain? I still can't answer that question.

I would tell myself that having a boyfriend doesn't define me. It's easy to feel excluded when all the seemingly cool girls are dating or have boyfriends. But you really don't need one. 

Those girls who always have a boy on their arm? They are just as self conscious as you are. Trying to figure out who they are and figure out life just like you. They've just learned to fake it. Down the road you will learn that sometimes you have to fake it, but being real is much more freeing.

Learn that your worth is defined by who created you. Not what you've done, what you are doing or what you will do. Not by a boy. 

I'd tell myself to focus on discovering....well....me. Search for the gifts God gave me and nurture those gifts. I wouldn't listen to the voices that tell me I can't sing or dance. That I'm not good enough. Those voices are jealous.

I would learn that I don't need a guy in my life to be complete. Be who you are. Be who you were created to be.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful I know that full well." - Psalm 139: 14

The dating? Finding the right guy? All in due time. But for now? For those teen and college years? Just seek who God created you to be and the rest will fall into place.

Comments

[Sheryl]

Great advice---no matter how old you are!

[Linh C]

I hear you...I have two daughters entering this stage of their life and I'm not looking forward to it.

[Katherine @ Grass Stains]

A-MEN! I would tell myself, for every time you accept plans with a guy (boyfriend or casual date), make plans with TWO girlfriends. I wish I'd invested more in my relationships with women during those years!

[Bonnie Gray]

Hi Amy!

Thanks for leaving the light on for me, here! I used to work with teenage girls and I always tried to encourage them to take advantage of their freedom, as an opportunity they have to discover who they are... To make my invitation sweeter, I always tell them, that confidence is very attractive to young men who want a girl who is interesting and alluring inside. It actually works in their favor. And I told them it will end up bringing bees to them like honey, if they can just savor the sweet life God has given them. Some of them listened. Some of them didnt'. ;) The ones who did always come back years later to say thank you!